Why Aren’t Men’s Issues Being Taken Seriously? - George TheTinMen
02 Nov 2024 (1 month ago)
Movember and Men's Issues
- The concept of men's mental toughness is criticized as being a rebranded form of toxic masculinity, with writer Jill Stark highlighting the example of Ned Brockman's 1600-kilometer charity run, which some view negatively despite its charitable achievements. (0s)
- The discussion points out the absurdity of labeling such charitable efforts as toxic masculinity, emphasizing that Brockman raised significant funds for the homeless, which should be seen as a positive accomplishment. (49s)
- There is a concern that the advocacy for men's issues is becoming fragmented as it grows, with some organizations becoming too involved in politics and losing focus on their primary mission to help men and save lives. (1m37s)
- The movement for men's advocacy is described as being at a critical point where it is too large to be small but too small to be big, leading to the emergence of different factions and approaches. (2m9s)
- The diffusion of innovation theory is mentioned, suggesting that the movement needs to reach a certain level of public adoption to become widely accepted, and there is a desire for unified efforts and shared objectives to achieve this. (2m37s)
Movember's Funding and Structure
- Movember is identified as a significant player in the men's advocacy space, originating as a campaign for men to grow mustaches in November to raise awareness, and it has grown beyond its meme status to become a major movement. (3m16s)
- The largest and most powerful men's health and male suicide charity in the world is described as having significant financial resources, which it distributes to researchers and groups rather than conducting direct work itself. This structure poses certain risks due to the disparity in resources between this organization and the impoverished men's health sector. (3m31s)
- Many individuals and smaller organizations working in the men's health sector face financial challenges, with some taking on second jobs or working without pay. An example is given of a person trying to open the first men's abuse shelter in the UK, who has taken numerous calls from men in need without receiving any salary. (4m24s)
- Mankind, a charity that operates the only shelters for male abuse victims in England, receives no national government funding, highlighting the severe lack of financial support in the men's sector. (4m46s)
- Despite significant public fundraising efforts, such as those by Movember, there is a perception that the funds are not being allocated effectively to address men's issues. The problem is not seen as a lack of public compassion or generosity but rather a misallocation of resources. (5m11s)
Movember's Focus on Violence Against Women
- Movember is recognized as a massive organization with a presence in about 20 countries, conducting numerous projects, particularly in prostate cancer and men's health. However, there is criticism regarding its recent advocacy focus on violence against women, while violence against men is also a significant issue that is not being taken seriously. (5m36s)
- Statistics are provided to emphasize the prevalence of male victims of abuse, with one in three victims in the UK being male, and in the US, the figure is one in two according to CDC data. This highlights the need for more attention and resources to be directed towards addressing violence against men. (6m41s)
- There are very few shelters available for men in both the United States and the UK, with only a couple in the US and slightly more in the UK, but still insufficient to meet the needs. (7m2s)
- Some organizations that aim to end violence against women have been receiving support and funding, which is seen as problematic given the lack of resources for men's shelters. (7m12s)
- Criticism of the focus on violence against women does not imply support for such violence; rather, it highlights the issue of gendered violence policies that often exclude men and boys from receiving aid and resources. (7m36s)
Statistics on Male Victims of Violence
- Statistics on male victims of violence vary, with some reports indicating that one in three or one in two victims are men, depending on the type of violence considered, such as emotional, psychological, or physical abuse. (8m30s)
- In the US, data from the CDC suggests there are more male victims of physical violence by partners, which is a surprising statistic that is not widely discussed. (8m50s)
- The perception that men are stronger and thus the severity of violence is greater when perpetrated by men is challenged by data from the UK's Office for National Statistics, which shows that male victims are often more injured by female partners. (9m47s)
- Discussions about violence against women often focus on extreme cases, such as homicides, which predominantly affect women, but these represent a small fraction of the overall issue. (10m11s)
- Domestic homicide is measured per million couples, while domestic violence is measured per 100 couples, highlighting a disparity in how these issues are quantified. It is noted that one in four victims of domestic homicide is a man, and when including male children, the numbers are closer to 50/50 between males and females. In Australia, for example, 36 males and 44 females are killed in domestic violence incidents, not just intimate partner violence. (10m29s)
- There is frustration over the narrative that women kill partners in self-defense, especially when considering that many male victims are children. The argument is made that every victim, regardless of gender or age, deserves attention and support. (11m15s)
Criticism of Movember's Funding Choices
- Movember, a men's health charity, is criticized for supporting movements to reduce violence against women while there is insufficient focus on violence against men. In the UK, male victims of abuse are classified under "violence against women," which is seen as a misclassification. (11m46s)
- The founder of the first domestic violence shelter, Erin Pizzey, was removed from her charity for wanting to help male victims and address mutual partner violence. She suggested that financial interests prevent more support for male victims, as acknowledging male victimization would require sharing resources. (12m57s)
- There is confusion over why a men's charity like Movember would donate to women's charities when they already have substantial funding, questioning the allocation of resources and the motivations behind such decisions. (14m4s)
Broadening the Definition of Men's Health
- There is a divide in the understanding of men's health, with traditional views focusing on physical aspects like blood pressure and obesity, while a broader perspective includes systemic societal issues affecting men, such as being victims of violence or facing challenges in family court. (14m12s)
- Men's health issues are not limited to physical health but also include experiences like being raped in prison, losing custody of children, being abused by a spouse, or being bullied. (14m29s)
- There is a perspective that considers violence against women as a men's health issue, aiming to treat violent men to prevent abuse, but this approach is seen as addressing only one side of the problem. (15m2s)
- In violent relationships, both partners often participate in a cycle of violence, and addressing only men's violence is insufficient. (15m24s)
- The concept of "healthy masculinity" is considered vague, and there is criticism that violence against men is not recognized as a men's health issue, unlike violence against women. (16m0s)
Challenges in Discussing Men's Issues
- There is a perception that public figures discussing men's issues must acknowledge women's issues first due to existing political and social norms, which can hinder open discussions about men's problems. (17m22s)
- The discussion highlights a concern that discussions about men's issues often begin by focusing on women's issues, which may undermine the intended focus and alienate some audiences. (18m12s)
- There is a critique of the need for constant apologies and disclaimers in men's advocacy, suggesting it weakens the message and sets an undesirable precedent. (18m50s)
- A significant issue in addressing men's problems is the intertwining of politics and funding in large organizations, which can lead to restrictions on what can be discussed or advocated. (19m11s)
- There is frustration with large organizations like Movember, which, despite having significant resources, seem hesitant to address certain men's issues due to political pressures. (19m59s)
- The text contrasts men's organizations with women's organizations, noting that the latter are more assertive in advocating for their issues without fear, and suggests that men's organizations should adopt a similar approach. (20m51s)
- There is a call for men's organizations to prioritize helping men and to be more courageous in their advocacy, even if it may be uncomfortable or risky. (21m5s)
The Impact of Family Breakdown and Domestic Violence
- Martin Seager attributes 20% of male suicides in the UK to family breakdown and child custody battles, suggesting that improving family courts and supporting men after divorces could potentially reduce male suicide rates by up to 20%. (21m37s)
- Domestic violence has a significant detrimental impact on men's health, with 11% of abused men considering suicide. In the UK, 750,000 men are abused annually, and in the US, 50 million men experience abuse in their lifetime, highlighting the need for recognition and support for male victims of abuse. (22m5s)
- There is a critique of powerful political Men's Health Advocates for being afraid to acknowledge that domestic violence is not gendered, which leaves male victims without necessary support. (22m33s)
- Despite extensive discussions on men's mental health issues, including loneliness, sexual dynamics, socioeconomic status, and education, there is a lack of strong advocacy or support for men's health initiatives, such as those by Movember. (23m2s)
- There is concern over the allocation of funds, such as the three million Australian dollars given to violence against women, with no equivalent support for violence against men, and a lack of plans to open shelters or programs for men. (24m4s)
- Men's health issues that are politically convenient, such as eating habits, physical fitness, and prostate cancer, receive more attention, while broader issues affecting men's health are neglected. (24m29s)
- There is a significant amount of money, between £35 million and £50 million, held by a charity intended to support men's issues, but it is not being utilized effectively. This money is accumulating interest instead of being spent on necessary services like shelters or support lines. (24m51s)
- The charity's accounts reveal that they are aware of the risk of reputational damage if the public discovers the large amount of unspent cash. Despite this, the funds remain largely unused while individuals struggle to raise money for male victims of abuse. (26m12s)
- The trustees of Movember Europe, the UK branch of the charity, are all based in North America and Australia, not in the UK or Europe. This raises questions about their ability to effectively manage funds for British men's health issues. (26m32s)
Movember's Direction and the Manosphere
- There is a discussion about the concept of "healthy masculinity" as a response to "toxic masculinity." Movember is reportedly planning an anti-manosphere campaign, which some question as the right focus for their efforts. (27m17s)
- There is criticism of the manosphere and figures like Andrew Tate, with a belief that the manosphere is declining and does not require a campaign against it. (27m43s)
- The discussion highlights the decline of the manosphere, suggesting that it is no longer relevant and that efforts should focus on genuinely helping men and setting better examples for boys. (28m16s)
- There is a call to challenge stereotypes about men, particularly the notion that men are inherently violent and women are always victims, which is seen as a stereotype that needs to be addressed. (28m50s)
- The conversation criticizes the mainstream media for being slow to catch up with internet culture, noting that the manosphere was a significant topic in 2021 but is now declining. (30m0s)
- The concept of toxic masculinity is still prevalent and continues to be a topic of interest, although it may not fully capture the current online discourse about men's issues. (30m23s)
Positive Male Role Models
- Chris Bumstead, a six-time Mr. Olympia Classic Physique Champion, is mentioned as an example of someone who challenges traditional masculine stereotypes by openly expressing emotions and seeking therapy, without being labeled as weak or toxically masculine. (30m52s)
- There is a discussion about the perception of masculinity, highlighting Chris Bumstead as an example of someone who challenges stereotypes. Despite his muscular appearance, he is seen as emotionally attuned and a potential role model for men. (31m44s)
- Chris Bumstead is suggested as a suitable candidate for a hypothetical role of "Minister for Men" due to his influence on social media, where he is followed by millions of men. (32m2s)
- The conversation touches on the need for better male role models and mentions Jordan Peterson as another figure who, despite being mischaracterized, has positively impacted men and boys by being in touch with his emotions. (33m1s)
- There is a call for organizations to correctly identify who is a positive influence on men to avoid alienating potential allies in addressing men's issues. (34m15s)
- The importance of accurately interpreting content related to men's issues is emphasized, with a stance that is not anti-anything but rather pro-men's issues. (34m42s)
- There is a critique of the contradictory messages men receive about speaking up, where they are encouraged to talk more but are often silenced when their views are inconvenient. (34m51s)
- Men often engage in activities like fixing things, going to the gym, or reenacting historical events as forms of therapy, which should not be mocked or dismissed as invalid forms of emotional expression. These activities can provide therapeutic benefits similar to traditional therapy. (35m14s)
- Russ Cook, known as "hardest geiza" on Instagram, ran the length of Africa, completing a marathon nearly every day for over a year. This feat demonstrates the pursuit of challenging goals as a source of meaning and fulfillment for men. (36m1s)
- There is a narrative that men should not always feel compelled to be strong, but many men find meaning in striving for strength and competence. Denying them the choice to pursue these qualities can remove a significant source of personal fulfillment. (36m50s)
The Drive for Achievement and Meaning
- The example of Elon Musk's management style at Twitter, where he encouraged intense work on difficult problems, highlights that some individuals thrive on challenging tasks and find them rewarding, despite criticisms of promoting excessive work demands. (37m43s)
- The discussion highlights the concept of toxic masculinity and questions whether certain actions by men are driven by societal pressures or an innate desire for meaning, contribution, and mastery. (38m39s)
- An example is given of a man named Sam who walked the length of New Zealand to raise money for male survivors of sexual abuse, demonstrating a positive and non-toxic form of masculinity. (39m9s)
- It is noted that many men value achievement and productivity, and this desire is not exclusive to men, as some women also express a preference for action over therapeutic models of therapy. (39m29s)
- The conversation touches on the idea that figures like Elon Musk and David Goggins can sometimes promote unhealthy masculinity archetypes, but they can also inspire men to achieve and improve themselves. (39m53s)
- A quote from Andrew Tate is mentioned, emphasizing the importance of action over mere discussion, which is seen as a positive message despite Tate's controversial reputation. (40m13s)
Men's Ways of Seeking Help and Expressing Distress
- The discussion explores the classic trope that men often seek solutions to problems, while women may prefer to be heard, highlighting a fundamental difference in how men and women present distress and seek help. (40m47s)
- It is suggested that men are often told their problems stem from being too masculine and that they should be more like women, focusing less on conquest and mastery, which is seen as a misunderstanding of men's needs for purpose and achievement. (41m30s)
- The discussion highlights the issue of denying individuals the right to live out their innate desires, questioning the labeling of certain activities, like extreme physical challenges, as toxic masculinity. (41m59s)
- David Goggins is mentioned as an example of someone who embodies perseverance, suggesting that men should use different role models for different situations, such as calling on their "inner Goggins" during tough times. (42m32s)
- The idea of moderation is emphasized, suggesting that consuming content from various figures like David Goggins, Jordan Peterson, and others in moderation is healthier than focusing solely on one. (43m29s)
The Need for Positive Male Role Models and the Rise of the Manosphere
- There is a struggle in men's advocacy to present positive and healthy masculine role models, with a noted absence of such figures leading to a vacuum filled by controversial figures in the manosphere. (44m14s)
- The rise of the manosphere is partly attributed to Jordan Peterson moving away from discussions about boys and men to focus on other topics, leaving a gap that others have filled. (44m50s)
- There is a significant demand for positive male role models, but a lack of supply, as seen with figures like Jordan Peterson and Warren Farrell, who faced backlash for supporting men and boys. (45m17s)
- Many boys lack father figures at home, and there are few male role models in classrooms and on television, leading to figures like Andrew Tate gaining popularity by speaking positively about masculinity. (45m55s)
- The rapid success of influencers like Andrew Tate is seen as a reflection of society's failure to address men's issues, as boys and men are often labeled negatively without being engaged in meaningful conversations. (46m24s)
The Struggles of Men and the Need for Support
- Interviews with men reveal that many are struggling with personal issues, contradicting the stereotype of men as privileged, and these struggles are often ignored or mocked. (46m58s)
- There is a call to improve support for men and boys, questioning whether current efforts are sufficient and suggesting that more can be done to help them. (47m39s)
- The importance of data and statistics in understanding men's issues is highlighted, with a suggestion to create a centralized resource for sharing this information. (48m5s)
Advocacy and Data on Men's Issues
- Successful social change campaigns work with those already on their side, but human tribalism can push people away if they feel like outsiders. This feeling of being "othered" can lead to alienation and resentment. (48m35s)
- Good advocacy for men's issues involves presenting data objectively to facilitate discussions based on truth, rather than subjective conversations about masculinity. Masculinity is viewed as neutral, neither inherently good nor bad. (49m32s)
- There is a contention regarding the evidence on gender parity in domestic violence. Some, like Richard Reeves, dispute the presented data, but the data is claimed to be supported by reputable sources like the CDC. (50m11s)
- Murray Strauss, a foundational figure in family violence research, has shown through numerous studies that there is gender parity in partner violence. His work is considered highly influential and cannot be ignored. (50m52s)
- The largest domestic violence database supports the view that domestic violence is mostly bilateral and not gendered, with some evidence suggesting non-bilateral violence is often perpetrated by women. (51m32s)
- The conflict tactics scale is mentioned as a tool in understanding domestic violence, highlighting how different questions can yield different insights. (51m55s)
- In the UK, one in three victims of abuse is male, while in the US, it is one in two, and in Australia, one in four. These statistics vary based on the methodology used to gather data. (52m5s)
- The Conflict Tactic Scale (CTS), developed by M. Strauss, is a widely used tool for studying domestic violence. It avoids criminal language, which can underrepresent the true extent of domestic violence, and instead uses more neutral questions about handling conflict. This approach often reveals higher rates of domestic violence and gender parity. (52m16s)
- Many domestic violence statistics are based on criminal records, which can be misleading as men are less likely to report abuse or receive help from authorities, leading to underrepresentation. (53m30s)
- The idea of a "Minister for Men" in the UK, a position that does not currently exist, is gaining popularity. This role would address issues such as male victims of abuse, sexual violence, bullying, homelessness, drug addiction, suicide, and family court challenges. (54m21s)
- A poll indicated that just under 50% of the British public supported the creation of a Minister for Men, reflecting growing recognition of the importance of addressing men's issues. (54m39s)
- There is a belief that the position discussing men's issues should be held by a qualified individual, such as a minister for men, rather than the current speaker, who feels unqualified. (55m24s)
- There is optimism that discussions about men's and boys' issues, such as education, will gain more attention and popularity in the coming years. (55m56s)
Challenges and Hopes for the Future of Men's Advocacy
- Concerns are expressed about the potential backlash and challenges faced by anyone who might take on the role of addressing men's issues, fearing they might be pressured to conform to certain ideologies. (56m23s)
- There is a call for courage in addressing unpopular topics related to men's issues, with a focus on preventing male suicide and addressing the root causes of distress among men. (57m20s)
- It is noted that while there is encouragement for men to talk about their issues, there is a lack of discussion about the specific problems men face, such as abuse, family breakdown, and addiction. (57m35s)
- An example is given of John Barry and Martin Seager, who faced significant backlash when attempting to establish a men's section within the British Psychological Society to address issues like male suicide. (58m7s)
- The British Psychological Society (BPS) held a vote on whether to establish a men's section, and one-third of its members voted against it, despite men being at high risk for suicide. This decision is seen as a failure to address critical men's issues. (58m46s)
- There is a suggestion to distribute funds more effectively, appoint trustees familiar with British and European culture, and govern organizations with a focus on helping men and boys rather than being influenced by women's organizations. (59m30s)
Criticism of Movember's Approach and Funding
- The Movember Foundation is criticized for potentially distributing funds based on feminist frameworks, which is seen as misaligned with its mission to support men, as most men and women are not feminists. The organization is encouraged to focus on research and support rather than political agendas. (1h0m29s)
- Movember is described as a powerful men's health and male suicide charity, but it is urged to advocate more strongly for male victims of abuse and not to be swayed by political narratives that focus solely on violence against women. (1h0m55s)
- There is uncertainty about how much Movember shapes the narrative around men's and boys' issues, and it is suggested that many people are unaware of Movember as an organization, perceiving it more as a meme. (1h1m53s)
- There is a perception that some organizations, despite having significant financial resources, are not effectively engaging with their audience on social media, leading to a sense of entitlement and a belief that they are leading conversations when they are not. (1h2m18s)
- Many individuals are hesitant to express their true opinions or conduct desired research due to fear of repercussions from well-funded organizations, which is detrimental to scientific progress. (1h3m43s)
- The concentration of financial resources in a single organization, rather than being distributed more broadly, is seen as problematic and potentially harmful. (1h3m50s)
Openness to Dialogue and Collaboration
- There is an openness to dialogue with representatives from organizations like Movember to discuss these issues, acknowledging personal limitations in certain areas such as psychology. (1h3m56s)
- Expertise in communications is highlighted as a key skill in making complex issues understandable and engaging, with a career built on improving the communication of academic topics. (1h4m36s)
- There is a desire to facilitate discussions and collaborations between different parties, such as academics and organizations like Movember, to address men's issues more effectively. (1h5m21s)
Addressing Bullying and Its Impact on Boys
- The discussion emphasizes the importance of addressing issues related to boys and men, particularly focusing on childhood bullying and its long-term impacts. (1h5m45s)
- There is a preference for engaging with children in primary or secondary schools, especially in areas where the speaker has personal experience with bullying, rather than prestigious institutions. (1h6m14s)
- Bullying is highlighted as a significant issue that can destroy lives from an early age and is a lens through which to examine toxic masculinity and the problematization of men. (1h6m43s)
- Research indicates a strong correlation between experiences of bullying and the development of violent fantasies in boys, with 97% of the most bullied boys experiencing such fantasies later in life. (1h7m17s)
- Violent fantasies are viewed as coping mechanisms for dealing with violence, and men who have them should be seen as victims deserving of sympathy and support, rather than condemnation. (1h7m31s)
- To address issues like toxic masculinity and male violent fantasies, it is crucial to tackle bullying and hold schools accountable for allowing it, as it is considered institutionalized abuse of children. (1h8m22s)
- The focus should be on supporting boys who are bullied and understanding the long-term impacts, rather than solely discussing toxic masculinity, which is seen as addressing the issue too late. (1h8m34s)
Addressing Systemic Issues and Early Interventions
- The discussion highlights the tendency to blame individual men for aggressive behavior rather than addressing systemic issues or societal expectations that contribute to such behavior. (1h8m48s)
- Evidence-based interventions for bullying are mentioned, with references to experts like Dr. Tracy Venor, head of anti-bullying in Canada, and Tony Vogs. There is an intention to invest in anti-bullying initiatives and speak in schools. (1h9m32s)
- Don Dutton, considered a leading expert on domestic violence, suggests investing in the early years of a child's life to ensure comfort and support for both parents, which could reduce future societal issues like crime. (1h9m57s)
- Dutton advises against focusing solely on gendered violence models and instead recommends couples therapy to address issues from both sides. (1h10m37s)
- The negative long-term effects of spanking children are discussed, with a focus on how it teaches children to solve problems through violence, which can lead to partner abuse behaviors. (1h10m53s)
- There is a call for more support for parents to prevent the need for violent disciplinary measures, acknowledging the speaker's lack of personal experience with parenting. (1h11m55s)
- Murray Straus, an expert on family violence, is quoted as saying that spanking children is the most prevalent yet most ignored cause of partner violence later in life. This suggests that experiences of physical violence in childhood can lead to the acceptance of violence in intimate relationships as adults. (1h12m5s)
- The argument is made that instead of investing in vague strategies, efforts should focus on addressing known issues like spanking children, which is rarely mentioned in domestic violence campaigns despite its significant impact. (1h13m12s)
"White Guys for Harris" and Political Alienation
- A discussion about a campaign called "White Guys for Harris" describes it as a large Zoom call that included notable speakers like Scott Galloway and possibly Reid Hoffman. The event is criticized for being a "struggle session" that failed to present a hopeful or positive message for the group it was supposed to represent. (1h13m45s)
- There is a sentiment expressed that many young men, particularly those on the political left, feel alienated from politics because they do not see their issues being addressed. This feeling of alienation is highlighted in the context of the "White Guys for Harris" campaign. (1h15m16s)
- A group of voters supports the 2024 presidential candidate Ross Morales Roetto, with Mike Nellis credited as one of the organizers. A July 2024 fundraiser with approximately 190,000 participants raised over $4 million. (1h15m32s)
- There is a focus on what any president can do for men in America, highlighting issues such as higher mortality rates for men at every age, educational setbacks for boys, and poorer health outcomes for men across various demographics. (1h15m53s)
- There is a call for political action to address men's issues, such as establishing a federal office for men's health, similar to the existing offices for women. (1h16m38s)
- The future of men's advocacy is seen as being at a crossroads, with an emphasis on collaboration with politics and academia to address issues like education, men's health, and suicide. (1h17m5s)
- There are specific red lines in advocacy efforts, such as not treating domestic violence through a particular framework or supporting organizations that do not endorse a minister for men. (1h17m33s)
- The goal is to see improvements in men's issues through meaningful political action and collaboration, with a desire to facilitate solutions. (1h18m10s)
Expanding Outreach and Engagement
- Expansion into podcasting and interviews on platforms like YouTube and Instagram is underway to further discuss and address men's issues. (1h18m34s)
- The text encourages viewers to engage with additional content that they might enjoy, suggesting there is something else available that they will absolutely love. (1h18m53s)
- Viewers are prompted to interact with the content by tapping on it, indicating a call to action to explore further. (1h18m56s)